Chapter 7 - WHAT THE BOOKS REVEALED
We got the books nine days later.
Not because Julian volunteered them.
Because Dana filed for temporary financial disclosures.
Mercer Ridge Consulting was real.
It had existed for fourteen months.
It had twelve clients.
And it had made money.
A lot more money than Julian had admitted.
I sat in Dana's conference room while she slid the report toward me.
"Read the highlighted number."
I looked down.
Gross revenue.
Two hundred and seventy-eight thousand dollars.
I stared at it.
"That can't be right."
"It is."
"He told me he barely had money."
"I know."
"Where is it?"
"That's the question."
Expenses consumed some of it.
Office rent.
Travel.
Meals.
Software.
Contractors.
But even after those expenses, the company had generated more than one hundred and twenty thousand dollars in net income.
I felt numb.
"Did any of it enter our joint account?"
"Very little."
"How little?"
"About nineteen thousand dollars."
I laughed.
I could not help it.
For fourteen months, Julian had watched me work late nights.
He had watched me cut expenses.
He had complained when I wanted to replace our broken dishwasher.
He had told me we needed to be careful.
Meanwhile, he had hidden a profitable company.
"Where is the rest?"
Dana turned another page.
"Some went to taxes."
"Some stayed in the company."
"And approximately fifty-three thousand dollars moved through payments to outside vendors we haven't fully identified."
My stomach tightened.
"North Ridge?"
"Some."
"MRC?"
"That's the rent."
"What else?"
She pointed.
"Halcyon Strategy."
I had never heard the name.
Twenty-eight thousand dollars in six payments.
"Who owns it?"
"We're working on that."
I stared at the transactions.
"Did he plan to leave me?"
Dana did not answer immediately.
"Maybe."
The word hurt more than I expected.
I had spent days telling myself the marriage was over.
I had removed my ring.
I had contacted an attorney.
Still, the possibility that Julian had been preparing to leave me first created a completely different kind of wound.
"There's more."
Dana pushed a second document toward me.
It was an email.
Julian had produced it as part of the disclosure.
The recipient was Marcus.
The date was six weeks earlier.
If E decides she's done, I need liquidity outside the house.
I read it twice.
Then a third time.
My hands began shaking.
"E."
Dana said nothing.
I knew.
Emma.
Me.
The email continued.
She's been impossible lately.
Always questioning expenses.
Always acting like because she's earning well, she gets to make every decision.
Marcus had replied.
Then stop moving money around until you know what you're doing.
Julian responded.
Too late for that.
I looked away.
For weeks, I had asked myself whether I had somehow blindsided him.
Whether a birthday humiliation had pushed me into a decision too quickly.
That question died in Dana's conference room.
Julian had been planning for the possibility of divorce before I had admitted to myself that I wanted one.
I kept reading.
There was another exchange.
Marcus wrote:
What about the kids?
Julian responded:
She'd never keep them from me.
She cares too much about looking reasonable.
I stopped.
My eyes burned.
Not because he thought I was a good mother.
Because he considered my decency predictable enough to exploit.
Dana leaned forward.
"You need a break?"
"No."
I continued reading.
Another email.
This one from Julian to an unknown address.
I need to get through the birthday first.
After that, we can make decisions.
I stared at the line.
"Who received that?"
Dana's expression changed.
"We don't know yet."
"Why not?"
"The address belongs to a private domain."
"Can we find out?"
"Yes."
"Is it a client?"
"Possibly."
"A woman?"
"Possibly."
I closed my eyes.
I hated how quickly my mind went there.
Affair.
Hotel rooms.
Secret meetings.
Twenty-eight thousand dollars.
Messages to Selina.
Comparisons.
Hidden company.
Hidden money.
Dana's voice interrupted my thoughts.
"Do not invent facts before we have them."
I nodded.
She was right.
I had spent too many years making excuses for Julian.
I was not going to replace excuses with assumptions.
"I want facts."
"Good."
My phone vibrated.
A message from Selina.
I opened it.
I found the screenshots.
Can we meet?
I looked at Dana.
"Something else just arrived."
Selina met me that afternoon at a coffee shop twenty minutes from my house.
She looked exhausted.
"Marcus moved into his brother's apartment."
I blinked.
"Julian has an apartment?"
Selina looked confused.
"What?"
I stared at her.
"Where?"
"Downtown."
"No."
I shook my head.
"Julian doesn't have an apartment."
Her face changed.
"Emma."
My stomach dropped.
"What address?"
She opened her phone.
When I saw it, my hands went cold.
It was the same building where Mercer Ridge Consulting rented its office suite.
"Marcus said Julian keeps a small apartment above the offices."
I stared at her.
"For how long?"
"He thought you knew."
I almost laughed.
Of course he did.
Everyone thought I knew.
Because Julian was very good at making lies sound like shared decisions.
Selina slid her phone across the table.
"The screenshots."
I looked down.
The first message from Julian had been exactly as she described.
Marcus definitely upgraded.
Selina replied.
That's a disrespectful thing to say about Emma.
Julian wrote back.
Relax.
Emma knows she's not exactly twenty-five anymore.
My stomach tightened.
There were more.
A month later.
Julian:
You ever wonder what life would be like if we'd met first?
Selina:
No.
And don't send me things like this.
Julian:
It's a joke.
Selina:
Then it's not funny.
I looked up.
"He tried again?"
"Once."
She scrolled.
The final screenshot had been sent twelve days before the birthday party.
Julian:
You looked incredible at dinner.
Selina did not respond.
I put the phone down.
"I'm sorry."
She looked ashamed.
"I should have told Marcus immediately."
"Did you?"
"After the second message."
"What did he say?"
Her mouth tightened.
"He told me Julian was going through a difficult time."
I closed my eyes.
Of course.
Even then, someone had protected Julian.
"There's something else."
I looked up.
Selina hesitated.
"Last month, I went to the building where Marcus said Julian's company was."
"Why?"
"Marcus left a contract there."
"And?"
"I saw Julian come out."
She paused.
"He wasn't alone."
My chest tightened.
"Who was with him?"
"A woman."
My fingers went cold.
"Did you recognize her?"
"No."
"What did she look like?"
"Mid-thirties."
"Dark hair."
"Business clothes."
"They didn't touch."
My mind raced.
"Then why does it matter?"
May you like
Selina looked directly at me.
"Because she used a key to open the apartment door."
